1 Nephi 8 - All the Feeling of a Tender Parent

In chapter 8, Lehi sees a vision of a tree filled with delicious fruit, and a large group of people attempting to walk to the tree and partake. The attempts, successes, struggles, and failures of the people he sees to partake of the fruit offer a powerful metaphor of our life on earth and our search for eternal happiness. While the full symbolism and meaning of this vision comes alive in chapter 11, a few themes emerge in chapter 8 even without a specific interpretation of the dream. 

Lehi is shown the tree after a long, lonely struggle and calling on the Lord. Lehi explains that at the beginning of his dream he was in a "dark and dreary waste." Only "after [Lehi] had traveled for the space of many hours in darkness" did he pray unto the Lord "that [the Lord] would have mercy on [him], according to the multitude of his tender mercies" (1 Nephi 8:8). In response to his prayer, Lehi was shown a tree, "whose fruit was desirable to make one happy" (1 Nephi 8:10). I imagine seeing this tree was a source of hope, comfort, and motivation for Lehi amid difficult and lonely circumstance. When we seek knowledge about our purpose in this life and our eternal destiny, the Lord give us knowledge and insights that reassure us and carry us forward through "dark and dreary waste-lands." 

Lehi described the fruit as "most sweet, above all that I ever before tasted," and "white, to exceed all the whiteness that I had ever seen" (1 Nephi 8:11). And when he began to eat the fruit "it filled [his] soul with exceedingly great joy" (1 Nephi 8:12). The fruit was delicious, pure, and nourishing; Lehi wanted his family to partake because he "knew that it was desirable above all other fruit" (1 Nephi 8:12). But when Lehi called his sons Laman and Lemuel to partake of the fruit, "they would not come unto me and partake of the fruit" (1 Nephi 8:18)

One possible interpretation of the fruit is that it represents the happiness and blessings that come from living the gospel (although, we'll talk in chapter 11 about how there is much more to it than that). My children are all still very young, and I have never experienced the sorrow, disappointment, and anxiety that surely comes when children choose another path and miss out on the happiness imagined and hoped for them by their parents. Lehi surely felt this urgency for the happiness of his sons, and "did exhort them then with all the feeling of a tender parent, that they would hearken to his words, that perhaps the Lord would be merciful to them, and not cast them off; yea, my father did preach unto them" (1 Nephi 8:37). What I never noticed before, though, is that after he preached to them, and strongly encouraged them to keep the commandments, he let the issue go. "And after he had preached unto them, and also prophesied unto them of many things, he bade them to keep the commandments of the Lord; and he did cease speaking unto them" (1 Nephi 8:38). He did cease speaking unto them. 

Surely this was not the last conversation in which Lehi urged his sons to be righteous, and I would never suggest that parents of wayward children should stop striving to teach and guide, but at least for a time it seems clear that Lehi refrained from preaching to his wayward children. In a recent article on lds.org "When Your Child Chooses a Different Path", Robin Zenger Baker beautifully addresses the tension between encouraging wayward children to return and loving them as they are.  She offers six practical principles for parents to follow, including cherish the relationship"

"Even when we don’t always love our children’s choices, we can let kids know we love them and want more than anything to stay connected ... Especially when children become adults, there comes a time where it is important to fully accept that these are your children’s choices right now, even if you don’t agree with them. Ideally, you can continue to hope that things will change, but also acceptthat this is how things are right now. Now is the time to focus on other aspects of the relationship that we can enjoy, outside of their choices about church" (Baker).

You can listen to her full interview on Gospel Solutions for Families on the Mormon Channel.

Another symbol that is introduced in chapter 8 is a "great and spacious building," which represents the pride and the vanity of the world, filled with people mocking and scorning those who are partaking of the fruit. Lehi noted that the great and spacious building "stood as it were in the air, high above the earth. And it was filled with people, both old and young, both male and female; and their manner of dress was exceedingly fine; and they were in the attitude of mocking and pointing their fingers towards those who had come at and were partaking of the fruit (1 Nephi 8:26-27).

Because of this ridicule, many people who had been partaking of the fruit felt embarrassed and left. "And after they had tasted of the fruit they were ashamed, because of those that were scoffing at them; and they fell away into forbidden paths and were lost" (1 Nephi 8:28).

Sure, I have been subject to good-natured ribbings from friends and coworkers about my religion, but I have never been truly mocked for my beliefs. So why do I feel so inhibited when it comes to publicly talking about my religion? What is driving this self-censorship?

This experiment to write my thoughts about each in chapter in the Book of Mormon has been a very instructive project for me in a number of ways. Mainly, it has forced me to share my deeply held beliefs and accept a new level of vulnerability. I can see and certainly acknowledge the tension that exists between secular and religious values; I would never minimize these rifts and associated antagonism. But these fissures that seem most stark along cultural fault lines and social issues should not mute my voice or prompt me to shy away from importance conversations. Cultural conflict is not my conflict, and owning the religious beliefs that are core to my identity does not reduce me a unidimensional cliche, regardless of what others perceive. In fact, the only way to ensure I am not reinforcing a flawed stereotype with accompanying biases and misperceptions is to share and talk about the ways I reconcile my religious beliefs and political views. 

I have never been directly persecuted. In fact, a number of people who do not share my religious views have publicly offered their support and encouragement for this project, and other choices I make to live my religion. Those who stopped partaking of the fruit in Lehi's dream did not do so because of the mocking (real or imagined) that they endured, but because they felt ashamed. The great and spacious building is within me, not without. Writing about the Book of Mormon is helping me to abandon shame. It is helping me be more true to the things I believe and the person I am. It is building my confidence in what God wants for me and my desire to be a force for good in the world.  Thank you for your interest and support!